Fatigue

I've had positive moments, and I’m now hitting another low point. I know it’s just fatigue, and that I’m just overwhelmed. At least, I got 70% of the grading done.

When I have those positive moments, I feel I can teach for the next semester. But then I think about the work I do now, and how much I hate it, and then I rethink my decision. I’d hate to stay in this job just for the money. It’s not about the money—it’s about the kids. Unfortunately, there are times when I don’t care about them. I feel like a parent before my own time. I don’t have kids of my own, and I feel that I’m raising them already.

It makes me think: do I want kids of my own? I shudder to think of that.